The stages of grief can alter your thoughts, feelings, and behaviors in everyday life. Whatever it may be – you are grieving because of the loss of a loved one, breaking up in a relationship or any other major life transition – grief can bring a lot of confusion and uncertainty into your life. One day you could be feeling sad and another day you could be feeling angry. There could even be times when you feel relieved or hopeful after.
Knowing about the stages of grief will assist you to understand the emotions that you feel and not judge yourself for them. We at MAVA Behavioral Health realize that grieving is not always easy and straightforward.
What Is Grief?
Grief is the psychological reaction to loss. While many link grief to the passing of a loved one, a person can go through grief reactions after a wide range of losses such as separation, divorce, loss of a job, major life change, loss of autonomy, and so forth.
Grief may impact emotions, thoughts, physical well-being, relationships, and routine activities. Frequent crying, difficulty sleeping, disinterest in usual activities, irritability, and inability to concentrate on tasks are common symptoms of grief. Explore the stages of grief and find compassionate telehealth services to support you through loss, emotional challenges, and healing.
There are no specific rules for grieving. Your attitude to loss, your support network, history, and individual way of coping can influence your grief reaction.
Understanding the Stages of Grief
These steps can be very helpful, but you don’t necessarily go through these steps in this order. You can miss one of the grief steps, feel multiple emotions simultaneously, or even revert to an emotion that you have previously experienced. There are five steps to the stages of grief which were described by Elisabeth Kübler-Ross:
- Denial
- Anger
- Bargaining
- Depression
- Acceptance
1. Denial
Sometimes denial helps you cope with something that is painful to face. You will find yourself saying things like, This cannot actually be happening” and even not discussing what happened.
Denial does not necessarily mean you don’t care. In some cases, your mind just needs some time to absorb the changes.
2. Anger
With the realization of what’s going on, anger can set in. You will find yourself angry at someone else, yourself, the situation, or life in general.
Anger often conceals other feelings such as fear, sadness, helplessness, and disappointment. The healthy expression of anger allows you to get over it instead of letting it control you.
3. Bargaining
The stages of grief bargaining can involve “what if” and if only thoughts . You may imagine ways the loss could have been pre-grief and the grieving process vented or wonder what you could have done differently.
Following a separation, bargaining may be something like, Had I communicated more effectively, we would probably still be together.” Following a different kind of loss, you might review the situation looking for a different result.
4. Depression
Grief-related depression can manifest itself as profound sadness, feelings of isolation, lack of energy, changes in sleep or eating patterns, and an inability to enjoy oneself.
Sadness in the grieving process does not necessarily mean that you suffer from clinical depression. However, very severe or prolonged symptoms should be addressed.
5. Acceptance
Acceptance is not about you agreeing with what has happened and not missing anything anymore; rather, acceptance could be about accepting the fact of your loss and then figuring out how to deal with this new situation.
Stages of Grief After a Breakup
The stages of grief after breakups can be more complicated because the individual is very alive in the world around them. The loss can be of a relationship, a set routine, a future, an emotional connection, or security. According to Harvard Health Publishing, grief can bring a range of emotional and physical responses as you adjust to a significant loss.
Phases of grief break up experiences involve denial, anger, bargaining, sadness, and acceptance, although your emotions will not necessarily fit this order.
You might feel fine one morning and be totally devastated by evening time. An event, a song, a picture, a message, a location, or a memory can trigger powerful feelings once again. Rather than wondering why you reverted, understand that the healing process is never straightforward.
What Are the 7 Cycles of Grief?
In some cases, individuals have sought out information on 7 cycles of grief or 7 steps of grief to learn about an expanded grief model. There are many grief models that break down the process of grieving into varying stages or cycles.
- Surprise or disbelief
- Denial
- Anger
- Bargaining
- Depression or sadness
- Acceptance
- Meaning or reconstruction
These names allow individuals to pinpoint their feelings but do not create a standard timeline. Individuals can experience these emotions in various orderings, repeat them, and even experience multiple at once.
Common Grief Symptoms and Signs of Grief
Symptoms of grief can have an effect not only on your mental well-being but also on your physical well-being, complicating your daily routine. Feelings of sadness or crying often, anger and irritation, guilt and remorse, anxiety, fear, or isolation can become apparent. Grief might be accompanied by lack of concentration or ability to focus. There will be changes in your sleeping or eating habits and fatigue.
You might also notice a loss of interest in things that you used to like before or a preference to spend time alone. Emotional numbness is another symptom of grief that might occur when someone feels overwhelmed with loss. You might constantly think about the deceased person, your relationship with him or her, or an event or situation that you associate with the loss.
Levels of Grief and Types of Grief
There are no set levels of grieving that everyone must go through. The level of grief experienced varies depending on the individual and the type of loss.
Different kinds of grief include anticipatory grief, complicated grief, disenfranchised grief, cumulative grief, and grief after a relationship ends. People may socially recognise losses, but some may make you feel you cannot grieve.
A breakup, for instance, can cause immense grief despite what other people expect of you, believing you should get over it fast.
How to Deal with Grief and Loss
Dealing with grief is not about finding a way to rid yourself of your emotions but rather about making sure that there are healthy ways for you to work through them.
1. Let Yourself Have Your Feelings
Don’t call yourself weak just because you are sad, angry, confused, or overwhelmed. Your emotions have meaning and may tell you something important.
2. Keep Your Daily Routines Going
Grief can affect your sleep schedule, eating habits, exercise routine, etc. Small, easy-to-keep routines can keep you grounded during difficult times.
3. Stay Connected
Grief may weigh heavily when you feel isolated. You may speak to someone close to you, surround yourself with supportive people, or even seek professional help.
4. Avoid self-blame
The bargaining and regret stage may make you dwell on the past. You should ask yourself if you are gaining from this experience or just punishing yourself for the things that you can’t change.
5. Give Yourself Time
You should not compare your own grieving to another person’s grieving process since there is no set timetable for everyone.
6. Look at Professional Help Options
Should your grief become too overwhelming, impair your ability to cope, or even worsen over time, you might need professional help to process what is happening to you and learn effective ways to cope. Professionals at MAVA Behavioral Health may prove helpful in such circumstances.
How Long Does Grief Last?
How Long Does It Take? There is no easy answer. Grief can go on for weeks, months, or even longer, and the level of pain changes through this period.
It is possible that you will feel well for a few days and then be hit by an emotional wave out of nowhere. Events, dates, locations, and memories can bring up emotions even if you have progressed in many ways.
Rather than judging your recovery by how you feel, judge it by how well you function, connect, take care of yourself, and live.
What Is the Most Painful Stage of Grief?
Which stage is the most painful stage of grieving? There is no one stage that everyone finds to be the most painful one. For some people, the shock stage can seem unbearable, while others may find the anger, bargaining, or despair harder.
However, after a breakup, the situation will likely feel even more painful once you realize that there is no going back to how things used to be.
The key thing to remember here is that being overcome by your feelings does not necessarily indicate failure on your part.
When Should You Seek Help for Grief?
If the grieving process makes a large impact on your day-to-day activities, or you cannot control it, then you should think about consulting a mental health expert. In case you have difficulty functioning, suffer from constant hopelessness, refuse contact with anyone else, and feel that your grief becomes uncontrollable, then you should visit a mental health expert.
In case you have suicidal thoughts or you are not sure whether you will be safe, then you should contact emergency services or crisis services in your region.
Treatment for the Stages of Grief
There is no drug or treatment method that forces you to go through each stage of grief in an orderly manner. However, treatment will be able to help you make sense of your feelings, cope with the loss, and restore balance to your life. Grief counselling or psychotherapy will give you a place to work on feelings of sadness, anger, guilt, anxiety, and loneliness.
In case grief leads to intense or long-lasting symptoms, a mental health professional will evaluate the situation and suggest treatment options. Treatment may involve individual counselling, group therapy, coping methods, and Online medication management for other psychological disorders like depression and anxiety if they exist. MAVA Behavioral Health can offer professional treatment for your grief and help you cope with your loss.
Moving Through Grief with Support
Stages of Grief can serve as an excellent model, but this model does not tell you exactly how your recovery is supposed to go. Your grieving is unique, and your feelings may vary from day to day.
There is no need to rush yourself into accepting everything or acting like nothing is wrong. Just allow yourself to feel, surround yourself with supportive people, keep up with your basic needs, and consult professionals when necessary.
At MAVA Behavioral Health, your emotional experience may become a critical step in discovering a healthy coping strategy.
Final Thoughts
Feelings of grief may be combined with sorrow, rage, confusion, guilt, or even hope, but there is no single road that will be good for everybody. It might be helpful for you to know about the stages of grief, but this doesn’t mean that you must experience all of them in any certain order or within any deadline. Just be patient and concentrate on small steps.
In case your grief starts taking over your life or it becomes too hard to deal with your emotions on your own, professional assistance will make things easier for you. MAVA Behavioral Health will offer you competent mental health support to cope with complicated emotions and find healthy ways to deal with grief.
FAQs
1. Does being in grief make daily activities more difficult?
Yes. Grief can cause even basic tasks to seem exhausting or impossible for a period while your mind tries to cope with the loss.
2. What causes some memories to be emotional?
Some memories are emotional due to the connection that you have with people, places, habits, or experiences. Listening to a particular song, catching a scent, looking at a photo, or visiting a place can cause you to cry even when you are stable emotionally.
3. Can I grieve someone who is still living?
Yes. You can grieve a loss when there has been a change in your relationship to someone that you care about and that individual is still alive.
4. How come people sometimes experience numbness when grieving?
Sometimes, numbness is experienced to protect oneself against excessive pain. It is characterized by detachment, feeling empty, and inability to cry. One should understand that this means no lack of emotion or affection towards the deceased.
5. Can social media contribute to making the process of coping with a breakup more difficult?
Yes, because seeing pictures, status updates, new relationships and activities of your ex-partner may only open old wounds.
